Quotes

"My life has reached its pinnacle: Joe's letting me close the store tonight." - Lucas

"In the immortal words of the doors, 'the time to hesitate is through' " - Lucas

"I know this, that if I win this roll, I will save the place I work at from being sold and the jobs of my friends that work there, thus striking a blow at all that is evil and making the world a better place to live in ...and, I'll buy you guys a drink." - Lucas

"I wonder if I'll be held responsible for this?" - Lucas

"I will not regret the things I've done, but those I did not do" - Lucas

"Mark, listening to this crap is guaranteed to make you sterile" - AJ
"So maybe I wanna be sterile" - Mark

"I have to tell Corey that I love her by 1:37 exactly" - AJ
"That's an excellent time" - Lucas

"You did have hair when you went in there, right?" - AJ
"Yeah, it's still in the sink if you wanna glue it" - Deb

"What's with you today? Yesterday you were normal and today you're like the chinese guy from 'The Karate Kid'. What's with you today? " - AJ
"What's with today today?" - Lucas

"Well Sinead O'Rebellion. Shock me, shock me, shock me, with that deviant behaviour." - Gina
"That is so smart! I swear you get smarter the shorter your skirt gets" - Deb
"And you get smarter the shorter your hair gets. Its probably a good thing you went with that" - Gina

"No we musn't dwell. Not today. We can't! Not on Rex Manning Day!" - Mark

"Always play with their minds" - Lucas

"The fat man walks alone" - Lucas

"SHOPLIFTERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Mark

"Isn't it customary to leave the scene after committing a crime?" - Gina
"Definately an amature" - Deb

"Attention Rex Manning fans. To your left, you will notice a shoplifter being chased by our night manager Lucas. This young man will be caught, and deep fried in a vat of hot oil and served to our first hundred customers. Just another tasty treat, from the gang, at Empire Records" - Gina

"Well outlaw man, we salute you" - Eddie

"We're both screwed - at least you're used to it" - Deb

"How old are you?" - Joe
"Old enough to kick your butt through your skull and splatter your brains on the wall" - Warren
"Yeah he's a juvenile" - Joe

"Why don't you go shove them up your ass" - Warren
"Because it would hurt a lot Warren" - Lucas

"And they said no revealing clothing, didn't they? I think Music Town is actually torn on the revealing garment issue! I think so!" - Gina

"Me Joe, you Jane!" - Warren

"Welcome to Music Town. May I service you?" - Gina

"Warren where do you get this hostility from?" - Lucas

"Who glued these quarters down?" - Warren
"I did" - AJ
"What the hell for, man?" - Warren
"I don't feel I need to explain my art to you, Warren." - AJ

"Warren, look what you took. Rap, metal, rap, metal, Whitney Housten" - Lucas
"It's for my girlfriend" - Warren
"Sure it is. You know, someone like you needs to deminish their criminal impulses, not magnify them. Maybe some jazz, or some classical." - Lucas
"Maybe you bite me." - Warren

"Dance party U.S.A. teenybopper type of shit, right?" - Warren

"Jane, did you compare the percentage of teenage male Rex Manning fans with the incedence of homosexuality amongst teenage males?" - Lucas

"I'm gonna get you! I'm not playing this time! I'll be back and you'll be sorry!" - Warren

"You make me feel like a bath?" - AJ

"The long arm of the law has embraced our dear friend Warren" - Lucas

"You left your thingy!!" - Eddie

"Why don't you all just fade away" - Rex

"Hey! Hey Mark! You love Gwar, why don't you join the band? Oh wow, man, Mark man, you play a mean guitar man. It's really a shame that you must die!" -
"Wow. I love you Eddie!" - Mark

"But I'm really gonna miss her, and I wish that I could've known her a little bit better" - Corey
"Dogshit" - Deb
"Hey, dead people don't talk." - Eddie

"Empire Records, Open til Midnight, this is Mark...    Midnight!" - Mark

"I used to pee in my bed." - Lucas

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